Why Sarah McLachlan

When you struggle with depression like I have, you have a tendency to cling to things that bring you hope.

The search for significance runs deep, and our yearning to be loved can bare some really devastating consequences when not handled properly.

Fifteen years ago, Sarah McLachlan was my crutch.

The inspiration that I found in her songwriting helped me immensely, and it was her music that carried me through some really tough times.

I set myself up for being teased because I wear my fandom so visibly on my sleeve, but that doesn’t mean I’m embarrassed by it.

You may have wondered, “Why Sarah McLachlan?” and now you know.

She’s someone that I hold very close to my heart for reasons I never felt I had to justify. But I’ve finally chosen to.

In short, she’s a memento of a time I nearly said goodbye.

The Solution

Last night I read this sentence at least a hundred times:

Drugs and alcohol are not my problem, reality is my problem, drugs and alcohol are my solution.

This was written by Russell Brand in a brutally authentic post that he recently published on The Guardian called My Life Without Drugs.

Go ahead and read it. Really, you should go read it.

I have so many reactions that I want to share about what he wrote — some shocking, some embarrassing — most of which you’d completely judge me on.

And therein lies the problem with being unfiltered.

Russell’s authenticity is set from the start, as he opens up immediately:

The last time I thought about taking heroin was yesterday.

I don’t know about you, but my initial reaction to this admission was judgement. But it didn’t take me long to realize I was calling the kettle black.

I struggle with a number of things, and to be honest, I think about them nearly every day of my life. That doesn’t means I succumb to those temptations, but the reality is they are always present.

I’m choosing to cut Russell some slack, because he’s doing the same for me.